PSP NEW CLOTHES!
NEW Pencil Box!
NEW BAG
NEW BBALL
Huge Gundam
A memorable 16 B'day!
NEW Billabong Wallet a new guitar? unlimited supply of movie tickets ;P
you know what? exams suck, i hate them, i have never hated them so much before... it sux when u work hard throughout the semester, thn at this point u know everything will depend on ur exams... u do well, ur current hard earned semster is worth it, but, if for some reason if the exam would suck, thats it, its the end of the world for me. think about it, u worked hard for every homework assignment, u worked harder than usual at the very least... tests also managed to do quite well, and actually managed to even put myself down to study properly one of the very few times in secondary sch. thn now the crucial time, i can juz go and die there.
Gahh so stressed out, i never cared so much abt exams before in my life, even psle sounds like a breeze at my current situation. ppl i talk to at times like this disappear during exam times, cos they are also stressed out or are studying. suxx man, i wanna get the exams over with, but i wanna do well as well. i can hardly imagine wad its gna feel like if i know i didn do well during the exams, and results would be juz a pain later on... more than making my parents happy, i wanna know that i tried, and i know i have done so until now, but its all gna be pointless if exams dun turn out well.
i dun wanna think of the future 3 years in sch, if year 3 is ald this bad... and look at my previous semester, i gave up halfway during the semester, and scored so bad. now i gotta make up for it, and make my year average at least an average score by doing well this sem. pressure sial. thn i need to do well agn the whole of next year, so that my transcript will have a high average. gahh, need to pull up my low scores, now wishing i didn have low scores in the first place. where were the people close to me to cheer me on last sem? nvm, past is past, and i ald screwed it up. present not tt bad, hate the future exams.
i feel so vulnerable now, easily hurt, emotionally unstable, and so damn frustrated! as mentioned before, ppl keep disappearing during this period. worse still, when i try to do smthn to calm me down, or at least de-stress myself, parents get in the way and put me back to studying in my room. every single time, i return to my room, especially i truly worked hard the past few hours, the feeling is sucky. most of the time i end up juz staring at my com or at the wall, not wanting to do other stuffs to distract myself. although not distracted, im not getting any work done either, kinda pointless rite? worse still other sch ppl finish their exams liao, some even school closed. just wondering, if i were in a norm sch now, life would be so much easier, juz like primary sch...
k i dun feel like typing anymore, dun wanna sleep, got nthn to do, and a pile of stuffs to do at my table. up till now, i havent felt so miserable before, thx to bday presents frm frends, and the only past exam was english, which turned out not to be that bad. but now 5 more exams coming up, and thanks for putting 2 exams on my bday, carn even enjoy it now. i express my heartfelt thanks to the guys who change deepavali frm 28 to 27, and thanks to u guys, now we got exams in a row. last time at least got one day break in btwn, better than nothing.
Kk stopping here, feel so sick of studies now. not gna sleep, dno how long im gna stay up. haixx
